Oh this is the way we roll here now!!!!!

A couple of photos to share:)
I love this photo of Zoe...my girlfriend from Adelaide and family decided that we would go garage sale shopping...we do it now and again and the kids get like an allowance and see what they can buy for 20c.....this day the girls found these *gorgeous* granny dresses and decided for $5 they would wear them through town and out shopping.....so we said why not! It was so hilarious! You should have seen people looking at them and of course they played up to it all the way.
After we got home the girls took the scissors to them and redesigned their own dresses, complete with maid head rags and the like, it was a really fun day.

The next photo is a few pieces of material that i have chosen for my quilt that i am making for my reading chair. I was actually looking for lime green hot pink and chocolate materials and i am not quite sure how i ended up with pink and pale green florals......i LOVE LOVE LOVE the centre material and will use that for my border as well. Its not a very good pic but i shall try to get a better pic.And a pic of the quilt i am going to make.
Unfortunatley, when i began cutting it out....i measured it wrong and all my pieces will be smaller cause i didnt tuck my material right into the corner of my cutting mat....but no matter, it will just be a smaller product right LOL

I realised that i havent been very photo sharing lately....not that ive taken many but there was an important milestone for Leigh on the 1st of May 2010.

He received his P's.
Yes that time has come for my baby to be independant.
Now it has been a long time coming. In his own mind he has fought many demons this last few months and i really feel that the receving of his licence has been a blessing and life saver to him. And yes to us on other levels. He was so caught up in Freedom and being able to do his own thing that it was an important milestone for him to reach.

I must say that there has been an HUGE improvement in him, his attitude to life, school, friends and us, his family.
We are so proud of him, he is trying so hard,he is alot happier with the added responsibilities and it actually shows in maturity that he has found.
You may see the southern cross decals on his car...well to him that is the sign of freedom, he is wanting to get it tattooed on his shoulder...hmmm not sure about that but anyway......he so wanted it on his car.

You have to laugh though because with a huge Great Southern Land sticker in hot pink covering his back window and great big pink stars on his bonnet you would know that it will stand out....especially to the boys in blue!

Yep you guessed it,,,,,,,his car screams LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME!!!!!! and so they did.....already,,,,,,so guess who has taken all the stickers off and has a car that looks nice plain and like evey other holden in town:)

Anyway thats a quick post for now:)
May even get another in soonish:)

Hmmmm just musing!

Its 20 past 7 on a beautiful autumn day. My family are all in bed and i have been awake since 5.10am.
This Labyrinthitisis such an annoying part of my life right now. Hmmm, Dont know how to put a link in.
Its stopping me from doing alot of things. Im not at work because obviously with the loss of balance i cant carry anything.....i made that mistake by going to town one day after being sick for two weeks. I was trying to carry one bag of stuff and that even upset my balance.
This morning i am quite nauseous again, as i was yesterday. This i believe from the chiropractor appointment i had on friday. But im hoping its a good thing. I am going back on monday for another adjustment.

I have good moments and bad moments of course, anything is better than flat on your back in hospital with the room spinning and your body constantly rocking, so for that i am so grateful! I am on steroids for the inflammation part ot the problem and it started off as quite a high dose. I am now down to one for three days then 1/2 for three days and off! Yay! They are such scary things. While in hospital i was getting haeart palpitations and the whole bed felt like it was moving when they happenend! Thanks goodness as the dose went down they stopped.

I have an appointment on monday for a ct scan and then later in the month an appointment with an ENT specialist. I did actually have a mild case of this last May so im concerned that it has reoccurred and so severely, i need to find out if i am able to prevent it from happening again too.

Well lots has happened since i have been sick but only in my own mind. I have done lots and lots of thinking which you are quite apt to do with too much time on your hands. Gosh 3am in the morning a couple of times lying in bed my mind just racing......

I have a couple of ideas i want to float about in my head for a while and ruminate on. I have an idea of something i can work from home with in the time i have available to me.
Now its coming onto winter and the days are shorter i am planning on breaking my afternoons and evenings into time slots! Well that is the plan anyway.No, that will happen, our mantra is Make it happen,Captain! So take leadership!

I have been quite slowly doing tiny things that are making me feel good...eg cleaning out the kitchen drawers while sitting on the floor cause im too sick to stand,,,,i couldnt read or use the computer for a while as the movements made my eyes move which in turn made me feel sick, like motion sickness.....umm.making tags for pantry baskets, sorting them while sitting on the floor. So i am doing small things with out exerting myself......well i was sleeping for up to 16 18 hours a day! So not like me.

This condition i have at the moment can be viral or caused by stress...im betting mine is stress related. We have had a pretty bad run this year with Leigh suffering from anxiety, i suffer from it too but i tend to hide mine alot. I am able to cope by pushing things aside rather than deal with them. Funnily enought this does work for me, however i think the other pressures of running the block,there were work issues, Leigh, the kids in general just not being supportive in anyway to us, except when it did count through season time for which we really really appreciate but unfortunatly there are the day to day things that are important and need taking care of. I was going to the gym every day which i absolutley love....but my thought process of i cant control leighs anxiety but i can control my life mantra may have gotten an bit in the way. Dont get me wrong...i love seeing my body toning i love seeings muscles define through my skin its such a buzz....if only i can do dance classes or kickboxing...alas nothing here though in my area:( *sigh*...i so wish i could dance....even a tiny bit!

While thinking i have realised that us, like everyone else rush through our days getting done what we have to, not always what we need to, due to bad time management, illness, work, and other commitments. Gee we dont even see our friends anymore or take the time to visit family and i am kind of ashamed about that actually. THe block has taken over our lives totally and completely, and do you know what........big lightbulb moment here!
Yes we have a block, yes its 17 acres, yes it has our dream home on it, yes its hard work, yes we both work full time jobs,,,,but do you know what......i wouldnt say i LOVE it but i sure enjoy the benefits of living here. But the biggest thing that hit me while here thinking is........this block is our business.......and we dont run it like a business with the attention it deserves!
I need to take an active part in it rather than letting Darrel do all the work....sure i help him but really my heart isnt always in it to be honest. Ive decided that i am going to learn Quickbooks, but there is an ulterior motive here.....i want to be able to offer my services to my boss at work so i can expand my duties there. There are some more opportunities available there and i am wanting to grab some of them for myself:) anyway i digress!

Maybe by giving it the specific attention it needs rather than muddle on from day to day there will be some structure and things will be so much clearer and easier to manage?? Well i believe so anyway.

I want to learn QB and the BAS ect so that frees him up a little. I want to help decide which new tree varities we are going to plant. Yes there are water restrictions here and alot of people have taken exit packages but we arent prepared to do that. We want to hang in there and hopefully the benefits will pay off or us in the long run. Chatting to Leigh the other day he asked if we were really going to stay here for 5 years, which was our plan but im thinking that we have been here for two already and that we arent as far ahead as we would like to be sooooooooo i am prepeared to jump in and go for it now. Dont get me wrong i still want ot move to the Gold Coast Hinterlands somewhere.....where i dont know but dont care either:)
But for the immediate future its full steam ahead running this BUSINESS we OWN!!!!!!!
Funny how a thought can change the way you feel about sonmething.

Well im guess i can rant on here for ages more and i do tend to ramble alot but thats how my thoughts flow......i wanted to get some stuff down today so i can read back on it later. I missed alot of blogging this year with leigh, i did want to talk about it but i didnt want the world to see the ugliness that anxiety brings...it affected our whole family and not in plesant ways.
I think by denying myself an outlet here too, by not blogging and not scrapbooking either it may not have helped with my own stresses and maybe this has all culminated in this point in time an a bit if a wake up call to get my shit together.

I do have to add though that on the 14 April 2010 Darrel and i have been married for 21 years! What an achievement! I know we didnt nearly make our 10th so to soldier on with the love and commitment we have to our lives and our children together i am SO glad we are here.
I would loved to have renewed our vows or at least held a party to invite our friends to celebrate our milestone but unfortunatley life got in the way and this opportunity shall pass......but there can be a chance to do something else....Darrel did mention he would like to renew our vows......???? I think id like to do that it would be amazing i think.

My baby brother is getting married on the 25th september this year. I am so looking forward to it. He has held us in high esteem for years, as has one of my sisters, little do they know how hard it can be at times :) but anyway it is quite humbling for your siblings to look up to you really and i am so glad he is getting married. Naomi is a very quiet girl but boy she has the reins with him...i know i would hate to live with him he is so like my dad and son, temper and anger issues but definatley not violent just outbursty:) She loves him very much and doesnt take his shit which is great.

Im also excited because one of my sisters who i havent spoken to for years is going to the wedding too. I, unfortunatley have made judgements about my family and i hold myself a arms length quite alot where they are concerned. She has a daughter a month older than Zoe and i do feel bad that they dont know each other and i have kind of passed my thoughts on to my kids...now to turn it around and explain that it was wrong of me and im actually hoping secretly that i can mend these relationships. I know we will never be close, because of my *mother issues* and they all talk to my mother...where i have absolutley no interest in her or her life whatsoever and i dont want her having any input into mine or even to think about my life.

I am so looking forward to us all going and i really want lots of photos of all my brothers neices and nephews together....especially the girls because they are such a spunky gorgeous beautiful bunch of girls......who i really lovexx

Anyway im guessing i should go........this has been good for me to get down and out there. No one reads this blog much so it is kinda like a secret diary:)
Hve a wonderful week whatever you are doing and i will catch ya later